Ugh. We're so over this challenge. Let's rip through the dresses and get to the fun stuff at the end!
Lorenzo loves it, but Tom is bored. It's just alright. Not really avant-garde and as much as we love Judy's noodles (especially after her BP show), we think she may have returned to that well one time too often.
The back's nice.
Next!
Suede watched I Dream of Jeannie as a kid and thought it was avant-garde cinema.
It's lame, it's silly, and Suede should have gone home for this totally uninspired look.
Oh, it's also badly made.
Next!
Fucking ridiculous.
We will give her credit for one thing only: she understood that one way to approach avant-garde fashion is to really go to town on shapes and silhouettes. Unfortunately, the shapes and the fabrics she choose gave us an Evil Queen from a Disney movie. Bleh.
And if you're going to make such outrageously large sleeves, you should at least make sure you make them both the same size. Then again, delusion ruled the day with Veronica this episode.
"Looking around the room I'm not impressed with anyone's design. Mine is the only one that looks avant-garde. And I feel like I got this challenge in the bag."
Yeah. The air bag.
"I thought it turned out really cool."
"Ha. 'Cool,' she says. She looks like a goth clown. There is nothing 'cool' here, let alone avant-garde."
"Excuse me? I'm, like, young and pretty and shit? I think I know what's cool. See the flower in my hair? Cool."
"Oh please, Bettie Page. You wouldn't know 'cool' if it threw up all over you. Which, incidentally, reminds me somewhat of this garment. Vomit. A big plaid bag of it."
"Now, Nina - can I call you Nina? I know you're, like, Miss Fashion Editor or whatever, but I really don't think you get what I've done here."
"Oh, honey.
Mommy's face is still swollen, so I'll just sit here and let the other bitch handle this one. Michael?"
"It's INSANE! The whole thing! YOU'RE insane! I think it might be making ME insane!
INSANE!"
"..."
"Yes. I think we're done here."
"Stupid, lazy American cow. Telling ME I don't know where the boobs go. I fucking made my fortune off these tits, bitch."
[Photos: Barbara Nitke/Bravo - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]
What a bizarre matchup. It's a shame Kelli got sick and couldn't help her more because we suspect there would have been some primo fireworks between these two.
What we got was little more than a dud, though.
Don't get us wrong. We don't hate it. We just don't love it and we think it's far from Korto's best work.
How strange that she went the noodle route. We don't think they really add anything to the design. In fact, they're kind of distracting.
On the other hand, this look is so boring, they're the only thing that provides much in the way of visual interest.
Well, the back of it does too but frankly, we don't think that works either. It's a pretty effect, but the proportions make her look a little hunch-backed.
It's certainly not awful and it's pretty in its own way, but looking at it, we have to remind ourselves that this was an avant garde challenge and we're forced to admit that as much as we like Korto as a designer, this, like almost all the entries, fails on that level.
Another bizarre teamup and yet, in its own way, it worked.
"Worked" in the sense that they managed to pair Joe's questionable taste in fabrics with Daniel's more traditional design sense.
It's not bad and it's certainly well executed, but again, it's not exactly avant garde.
It's just voluminous and a little over the top.
The only real problem we had with the design (aside from its mediocrity) was the bodice. It sits too low and the bustline is uneven. Plus, we're not really getting the point of the "ripped open" effect.
Despite our criticisms, it's not a bad entry, all things considered. Better than most, certainly. Just....boring. The whole point to avant garde is to be the opposite of boring.
[Photos: Barbara Nitke/Bravo - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]
Irony abounds, darlings. The one we wanted sent home from week one kinda grew on us and the one who deserved more wins under her belt couldn't get off our TV screen fast enough last night.
Were they not the cutest team? It seems no matter who Stella is paired with, we want them to get a reality show together.
Dear GOD, kittens.
What are we supposed to say here?
The Duchess nailed it: it's a joke.
When clowns get tumors, is this what they look like?
Variation on a theme: clown farts.
We don't get it at all. Why pair all those candy colors with a flesh-colored aerobics outfit? What was the point to all the leathuh straps, aside from giving Stella something to do?
"Think out of the box, Heidi."
Even though Blayne started out pretty damn annoying, we were kind of fond of him by the end. He's just this clueless kid who seemed to be having quite a bit of fun throughout the competition.
Sure, he played to the cameras too much and he never produced anything that proved to us that he should be there, but we can't hate people who try and bring a little lightheartedness to all the pretension and bitchery. Au Revoir, Blayne de Soleil.
Worst team ever? Quite possibly.
Keith was still in full-on feel-sorry-for-me mode and while we don't blame Terri for having little patience for him, the fact is, she was OUTRAGEOUSLY nasty the whole time. There's fun bitchery and then there's just ridiculosity.
And speaking of ridiculous...
Although, to be fair, we really didn't see this as deserving of the auf. We don't exactly like it, but there were others on that runway that screamed "SEND ME HOME!"
Really, the only thing we hate are those ridiculous sleeves.
They look chip in a chip way, no?
It's kind of ironic, because during the drag challenge, Terri made a decidedly UNdrag garment and now for the avant garde challenge she makes something that would fit right in at the Night of a Thousand Gowns.
Oh, right. We hate the big tails, too.
The rest of it's just okay. Not avant garde, but then again, what was last night?
We kinda wish she'd stuck to the fur idea. It might have bumped this look up a bit. As it is, it just looks kind of tacky and tawdry.
And how DELICIOUS that Xaviera couldn't keep herself from busting out at the Duchess' comments. That is a PR first.
"Voodoo princess in hell." That's about right.
We're not giving Keith a free pass here. He was whiny and annoying but from what we could tell, he started off ready to help Terri. Her over-the-top bitchiness toward him was just ugly to watch and we kind of think since she clearly couldn't keep it off the runway, it played a part in the judges' decision to send her home. Sucks for her, because she did some damn good work during the competition and didn't get enough recognition for it. On the other hand, she was just so damn nasty last night that we couldn't work up a lot of sympathy for her.
