It was bullshitty in the first place that Jerell even had to compete for a spot in Bryant Park. He won that last challenge and by the rules of the competition that should have guaranteed him a spot.
Unfortunately for him, the producers just couldn't leave well enough alone.
Which, come to think of it, is also a pretty good way of describing this dress. Jerell just couldn't leave well enough alone.
We think he never should have been put in this position, but we can't deny that, based ENTIRELY on the dresses shown last night, the judges made the right decision.
Pitchforks down, ladies!
As much as we would have rather seen Jerell stay than Kenley, there's no way we can defend this dress.
And as bullshitty as the manipulations were that got us to this point, we have to say the judging was dead on last night. The tulle at the bottom looks dirty and overwhelming.
The ripped open, bejeweled bodice was tacky as hell and frankly, kind of ugly.
Although to be fair, we did like the way the skirt was constructed.
But let's face it, the styling was a joke.
And we haven't even started on this one yet.
We can all rail and moan about the endless amount of flaming hoops they're making the designers jump through but at the end of the day it's a design competition AND a reality show. This is what they do and they've done it before, so we can't get too upset over it this time.
If we had to guess, we think Jerell succumbed to Michael Knight/Daniel Vosovic Syndrome. Once he got away from Tim and the judges, he only remembered their praise and none of their critiques and not only did his designs go off the rails but he got a little cocky about it to boot.
Seriously, people. What the fuck.
No one loved Jerell more than we did and we'd been routing for him to take his spot in the final 3 for a long time, but YARN?!
Considering he apparently wanted to create an ugly dress, well...mission accomplished, Jerell.
Come on, ladies. We know you're all mad at Kenley (and the judges and the producers) and while we're not thrilled with the outcome, can you deny that this dress is a mess?
I mean, we're not talking about some 2-day challenge with materials from a landfill. We're talking about a Bryant Park collection. This shit needed to be gorgeous and most importantly, impeccable.
It's so half-assed and wrinkled and sad-looking. And he just shoved those flowers into the sash.
Before anyone accuses us of being in the tank for the judges or getting payola from Bravo (we WISH), let us reiterate: we HATE the manipulations the producers put them through and we firmly believe Jerell earned his place in Bryant Park last week, BUT this is what they decided to do and Jerell had choices to make. His choices including blowing off Tim's advice and shrugging his shoulders at his half-assed "ugly" bridesmaid dress. Whatever we may feel about the producers or the judges or even Kenley at this point, we can't deny that these two dresses were the worst two dresses on the runway last night.
Still, we feel awful for Miss Jerell and we're terribly sorry that she didn't get her shot.
You can see the rest of Jerell's collection and runway video here.
Unfortunately, you did it again in the bullshittiest episode of the season.
What a bunch of sourpusses.
This happens every season. They whittle it down to 4 or 5 exhausted designers, hand them an ill-defined "inspiration" challenge (along with a camera) and send them stumbling out into the sunshine, teary-eyed and emotionally drained. Results? Pure ass.
When Jerell got back from mood and dumped out his stash, we both groaned. "Jerell has terrible taste in fabrics," we sniffed.
And later, "Oh, Miss Jerell. You need to lay off the sparkly stuff."
But y'know? The dress wasn't half bad. In fact, it was pretty good.
Maybe we're giving it higher marks just because we were drowning in a sea of ass, but we don't think so. Taken on its own, it's sharp and distinct and eye-catching.
Granted, we had a hard time reconciling his fabric choices with his inspiration. Those beautiful purples and pinks didn't call to mind such dark fabrics for us - nor did we see the point to all that shininess since it appears nowhere in the picture.
And that bustline is scaring us. Poor girl was scared to take a breath for fear of wardrobe malfunction.
Still, the final product was beautiful, it can't be denied. We love the silhouette and how it just gets bigger and further away from her as you go down.
And we love the fullness of the back.
We're not supercrazy about the color choices and like we said, the fabrics themselves didn't look rich enough, especially on the bottom. And speaking of the bottom...
This is just bad and we are once again forced to admit that the skill level generally speaking just isn't on the same level of previous seasons. There's just no excuse for such poor execution from someone who's made it this far in the game. Jerell talked a good game to the judges about what it would have looked like if he'd had more time and money, but frankly, we're surprised they didn't come down harder on him for that.
And speaking of judges...
Hello, Mrs. Harvey Weinstein! What took you so long? To be fair, she was a pretty good judge. It wasn't her fault she was brought in on an episode with such assery from the other judges. "Congratulations, Jerell! You've not only made it all the way to the end, you WON the final challenge! Now go home. We'll let you know in a couple months if you can show at Bryant Park."
Two words: Bull and Shit.
The only reason the judges did that was because the producers wanted to keep Kenley in the game and they needed to make it sound like they couldn't decide. We have no doubt that the plan was to send Jerell home but they couldn't do that because he did a better job than all of them. At least in S3 when they clearly wanted to send Uli home to keep Jeffrey in but couldn't because she surprised everyone by winning the challenge, they gave ALL FOUR of them the chance to show at BP.
Shitty, shitty, shitty decision. Sorry, Jerell. You deserve your spot in Bryant Park but the producers had other ideas.
[Photo: Barbara Nitke/Bravo - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]
It was like the producers just got tired and said "Enh. Just throw everything at them." Auf'd designers, previous season designers, alcohol, team challenge, avant garde. We're assuming they didn't have the budget for the flaming hoops and shark pits.
Don't get us wrong. It was fun to see the previous seasons' designers, even if most of them barely got a couple seconds of screen time. Princess here mugged and shimmied for all she was worth, didn't she? Something tells us that she misses having cameras on her pixie face 24/7.
Big props to Carmen. She looked absolutely gorgeous.
Now. About that judging...
Honeys, we just don't get it.
But before we jump allover Jerell's entry, we have to say we don't get ANY of it. If we were the judges, we wouldn't have been able to pick a winner or a loser (well, maybe Blayne was kinda obvious) because the entries were so mediocre last night and so not what we would call "avant garde."
Moving on...
We're thrilled that Jerell won it because he's the only one of these bitches that seems to be having fun and that is exactly how one should approach a reality competition.
As is that.
As for the dress:
Foregoing the fact that there is nothing remotely avant garde about this design, we think it suffers from some Jerellisms: the pairing of fabrics that really don't go together, the over-layering to the point of sloppiness, and the truly execrable styling.
That jacket is HORRIBLE. Terribly overdone, plus it just doesn't "speak" to the other two fabrics.
We do think the skirt is gorgeous and we love the little flaps on the side.
That jacket was absolutely butt ugly, but when she took it off, the design suddenly became more elegant - although even the two remaining fabrics don't look like they go with each other.
Without that jacket, it's a lovely silhouette. That skirt is a beautiful piece and the whole look rests on it.
See? We like the look just like that. We don't think there's anything avant garde about it, though. Honeys, we're just confused and we're going to need some more coffee to figure the rest of these dresses out.
For what it's worth - CONGRATS JERELL! You're going to Bryant Park! Just please let someone else make the styling decisions for your runway show.
Nothing about this really speaks to the whole '40s spy, Marlene Dietrich thing but then again, we'd lay odds that Blayne has absolutely no idea who Dietrich was.
We like the coat quite a bit taken on its own. For this outfit and this challenge, not so much.
We hate the knickers too but only because he chose a poor fabric for them and because they just don't go with the whole theme.
But y'know, Blayne isn't the joke we all assumed at the start of the season. He definitely has a youthful point of view and some skill as a designer. We just think he suffers from a kind of designer immaturity. No understanding of how to put a look together or how to draw on reference points.
On the one hand, we can applaud Jerrell's attempt to really fit this into an existing collection. The cinched waist with the belt and the layered looks is very much of a piece with DVF's collection.
On the other hand, that belt is the wrong color and the layered pieces look a little too bulky and sloppy.
Plus, the skirt's too short. And we hate the hat. Despite that, not a bad effort.
Oh, for God's sake.
We don't know WHAT the hell's going on here. We're happy to see him break away from that party dress silhouette he was falling back on too much, but this isn't exactly an improvement.
We like that print but we don't think he utilized it well at all.
And that vest is totally wrong. Neither the fabric nor the shape goes with that dress.
The skirt's too full up top...
...and too long on the bottom. Just an all-around strange look from a strange designer.
