More Stylista, Bitches!

Let's take a look and see how the Yearbook Committee did with their assignments, shall we?


Team Stiff is more like it.


It looks like a mannequin auction.


This show is going to win awards for ripping off the veil and exposing the harsh reality of clueless twentysomethings who can't comprehend the basics of appropriate workwear.

Seriously, what the fuck. Who would think that leopard print mansandals are a good idea for the office? Anne Slowey wears the costumes on this show, not you!


Could that layout be any more basic?


Team Can't-Follow-Simple-Instructions.


We'll give them credit, though. Their work outfits were all pretty good.


And their layout was decent, but come on, they couldn't even follow basic instructions on the word count. FAIL.


Team No-Design-Sense-Whatsoever.


Or maybe Team Gray. They look like a meeting of College Republicans.


Ahhh! My eyes! This is Elle, not Scrapbooking Monthly, you amateurs!


We don't know what her problem was. We thought this dress was cute. You don't HAVE to show off your investments everytime you dress, Kate.

Question time:

Why would the judges praise this outfit...


...and then rip this one to shreds for being too dull?

Answer: TOTALLY ARBITRARY JUDGING!


"Arnaldo, there is no bigger crime in fashion than being boring, which is why I'm dressed like a blind clown. You should have listened to Joe Zee and taken more chances."


"Just look at that wild man! I am GIDDY with the chances he took today! You should be more like him."


"Your striped tie is NOTHING like Joe's striped tie. I am disgusted. Get out."


"And put your bag in a box so it looks like you cleaned out your desk."

Previews, Bitches!:

Anne gets her bitch on!


And Jason is overcome with Fashion Anxiety!

Trust us, the claws come out tonight! We're even opening T Lounge again!

[Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com - Videos: YouTube/CWtelevision]

Stylista Toons!

Stylista is such a trainwreck that even Alex has to hop on board! We are proud to present the first installment of:

THE TOOTIEVILLE HORROR!

More Tootie horror to come!



[Illustrations: Alex Cox/Projectrungay.blogspot.com]

Stylista, Bitches!

Just like every single person involved with this show, we have absolutely no idea what we're doing, but we're just going to wing it anyway. Darlings, what a delicious trainwreck that was.


First off, let's give a hand to Ann "I'm trying WAY too hard" Slowey!


From the awkward posing...


...to the utterly bizarre clenched-teeth delivery, Ann promises to be a veritable garden of bad reality television entertainment. Two things we can say with near-certainty:

a) That's not her office
b) She doesn't dress like that to go to work
c) She's a prime candidate for a high colonic

Okay, that was three things.


Tell the only African-American girl in the room that she looks like a waitress, Ann! You're brilliant, darling! Why not just call her a maid? Did the producers have an unexpected attack of good taste?


Special attention must also be paid to Joe "You should have fun with your clothes and that's why I'm dressed like a Secret Service agent" Zee! Fabulous hypocrisy! Totally arbitrary judgments!



And let's put our hands together for Mega-Bitch Megan! For someone who looks like a young Liza Minelli, she sure thinks awfully highly of herself, doesn't she, Kittens?


Especially since she can't even remember the particulars of the simplest editorial assignment. But, she's happy to be using her brain, "for once."

Let's plot her downfall, shall we?



Also, Boobs! Boobs that can cry on command! We smell Emmy, darlings!


People that show up for work fresh from Clown College! Fantastic! Juggle something for us, Brit Boy!


Sweet overweight girl who spends all her time worrying that people might notice she's overweight! Cable Ace Award, darlings! Guaranteed!


Although we have to admit, if we're rooting for anyone it's Ashlie. She's fucking fabulous. Plus, Megan hates her which can only make us love her more.


And that loft is gorgeous. Perfect for late-night crying jags and vase-throwing fights.


Sure, the first two challenges - Buy breakfast! Go shopping at H&M! - are more akin to something a therapist would assign to an agoraphobe, the challenges do get slightly more interesting as the show goes on.


And yes, they've managed to assemble quite the cast of self-involved bitches and sweet, clueless naifs. We look forward to tearing them all to shreds so they and all their friends can post anonymously and call us old and fat.

We have much, much more to say, so watch what hap-- uh... keep watching!


[Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]

Stylista Tonight!

Tootie Slowey in HUGE shoes!

Movie Fone Narrator!

Crying Contestants!

Baby Tootie!

He's a backstabber in a good way!


More Movie Fone!

Repetitive shots!

More crying!

Get a dictionary!

Joe Zee is a bitch!

It's all tonight, bitches!


[Videos: YouTube/CWtelevision]